Silver Surfer 33 - Acts of Idiocy

And now we come to another parody as the Silver Surfer encounters the Impossible Man...

Silver Surfer #33

Jim Valentino: wrote it without a care
Ron Lim: Artist extraordinaire
Tom Christopher: Inker beyond compare
Ken Bruzenak: Lettered it in his lair
Tom Vincent: Colourist with flair
Craig Anderson: Edited it in his underwear
Tom DeFalco: All he could do was stare!

The whole thrust of the 1987 Silver Surfer series was that the character belonged out among the stars, not confined to Earth. Additionally "Acts of Vengeance" came at a slightly difficult period creatively as Steve Englehart was wrapping up his run and fighting off editorial interference then came a couple of fill-in issues before the arrival of Jim Starlin with #34 who immediately kicked off the saga that would lead to Infinity Gauntlet (and the film Avengers: Infinity War). Putting the Surfer into Earth-based crossovers had already created awkward chapters in the annuals that had to contrive ways to get him back to (or at least near) the planet. Having such a powerful being lured to Earth by the alliance of super-villains just to target him would make little sense. So it's unsurprising that he was left out of it all and instead had a parody of the concept as the sole chapter of "Acts of Idiocy".

It's a straightforward issue. In it the Silver Surfer literally bumps into the Impossible Man and has to endure the latter's silliness, then deal with a fleet from an alien planet whose monarch has been insulted and wants redress. Impossible Man stories are often more about the character's wackiness and the frustration of those who have to endure him, than heavy in-depth plots. It's also quite a visual parade with the Shapeshifter taking on numerous forms ranging from Howard the Duck to Galactus to Forbush Man to Spider-Ham to it-looks-like-Superman-but-due-to-copyright-it-isn't to the Yellow Kid to Marilyn Monroe and many, many more. The Surfer is traditionally quite a noble serious character and so must be even more frustrated by this than most, yet can't let the Impossible Man be killed.

This issue may be an event driven fill-in but it's a reminder that the series as a whole went through periods when it seemed to be more about Marvel's outer space population as a whole with the Surfer at times a mere guide to everything rather than the driving force of the stories. Still here that comes with the territory.

Doing an in-universe parody of the crossover event rather than contorting to fit a deep space set series into an Earth based series is a wonderful solution to the problem. The Impossible Man is a particular taste, so this issue stands or falls depending on one's liking of him but it's quite a good portrayal of the character and he went on to encounter the Surfer a few more times, one of the more enduring relationships to have come out of the event. This is a good humorous issue of the series and a fun parody of the concept.

Silver Surfer #33 has been reprinted in:

• Impossible Man (2011)

Combat Colin vs... Doctor Doom!?! - Acts of Vengeance

Now here's perhaps the most overlooked entry in the "Acts of Vengeance" saga but don't worry, its inclusion will be explained...

Once upon a time Marvel UK produced many additions to the Marvel universe, whether additional tales that enhanced characters created in the US books such as the Black Knight or originated characters aimed at the British market such as Captain Britain. But by the late 1980s this had largely dried up with the company increasingly focused on licensed titles that ranged in age from Thomas the Tank Engine through to Doctor Who Magazine. (The 1990s would see a return of superheroes and British originated material, before the company came crashing down due to over expansion.) One of the best known titles of the period was Transformers, a (mostly) weekly that combined reprints of the robots in disguise from the US comic with originated British strips plus some reprints of other US strips, most notably G.I. Joe under adapted titles.

A feature of many of the Marvel UK titles of the era was a comedy strip, offering a humorous take on some of the broader themes. Easily the most admired is Lew Stringer's Combat Colin, which originated in the weekly Action Force (an import of G.I. Joe) but got carried over into Transformers via a notional merger and proved popular enough to stay for the rest of the title's run. Had Transformers UK's reprint schedule gone according to plan then issues #270 and #271 should have been midway through printing about US #64, which came out in the States just after "Acts of Vengeance" finished its run. (Instead this period saw some scheduling problems in obtaining the latest US stories, resulting in the decision to instead raid the archives and run the G.I. Joe vs the Transformers mini-series that Marvel UK had previously not used.) So it's reasonable to treat this little adventure as another entry in the event.

Our story sees daft military nut hero Combat Colin and his sidekick Semi-Automatic Steve attending a convention of British heroes and comic characters, including Macho Man from the old Secret Wars II comic, where they're attacked by the robotic Steamroller Man, sent by a mysterious master. The villain is revealed to be none other than Doctor Doom, sick of being defeated by all the US Marvel heroes so hoping for an easy victory.

At two pages it's a quick fun piece, with nice little touches such as Doom's cloak having a greyscale effect that often arises from converting colour comics to black & white thus making him look like an American import whereas all the British characters and setting have a clean-cut black & white look. Steamroller Man sings a song to the tune of the original Spider-Man cartoon. There's fourth wall breaking but it's worth it. And there's a brilliant final line suggesting an encounter we'll probably never see. The story may lack an official tie-in triangle but it's good to see one of Marvel UK's strips joining in the spirit of things.

This story hasn't been reprinted anywhere, and I suspect the use of Doom means that copyright will prevent it appearing in the current series of Combat Colin reprints. However it was posted online a few years ago at Lew Stringer Comics: Combat Colin vs... Doctor Doom!?!

What The--?! 6 - Acts of Vengeance

Marvel has a long history of self-parody strips and comics, ranging all the way back to Not Brand Echh in the 1960s. Its main series in the late 1980s and early 1990s was What The--?!, which had a 26 issue run over five years with even the schedule a parody at times, coming out monthly, bimonthly, quarterly and appearing at random times. Issue #6 came out during a big event and parodies it with 'Everybody vs. Everybody Else in "SMACKS OF VENGEANCE!"'

What The--?! #6

Written and pencilled by: John Byrne ("Smacks of Vengeance")
Inked by: Terry Austin ("Smacks of Vengeance")
Lettered bu: Rick Parker ("Smacks of Vengeance")
Coloured by: Mike Rockwitz ("Smacks of Vengeance")
Co-Writer: Doug Rice ("Origin of the Pulverizer")
Co-Writer/Artist: Hilary Barta ("Origin of the Pulverizer")
Letterer: Willie Schubert ("Origin of the Pulverizer")
Colourist: Linda Lessmann ("Origin of the Pulverizer")
Writer: Howard Mackie ("Sore wants a Haircut!")
Penciler: Adam Blaustein ("Sore wants a Haircut!")
Inker: Chris Ivy ("Sore wants a Haircut!")
Letters: Brad K. Joyce ("Sore wants a Haircut!" and "Adventure into Boredom! Fear!")
Colourist: Ronn Stern ("Sore wants a Haircut!")
Story: Peter B. Gillis ("Adventure into Boredom! Fear!")
Pencils: Doug Rice ("Adventure into Boredom! Fear!")
Inks and most of the good jokes!: Hilary Barta ("Adventure into Boredom! Fear!")
Colours: Kelly P. Corvese ("Adventure into Boredom! Fear!")
Editors: Terry Kavanagh and Carl Potts
Editor-in-Chief: Tom DeFalco

This eight-page strip doesn't go for a big spanking fest but rather justifies its title with an intro that explains the situation just "smacks of vengeance". In this parody there is a small invasion by villains from the Dee-See universe such as the Jokester, Sinestronie, Magilla Grod and Metal-Toe, causing problems for heroes such as Scaredevil, the Mighty Sore, Wrillimean and the Revengers, led by Chaplin America. There's even a cameo by Casper and Wendy from Harvey Comics before Chaplin America decides there are too many companies and throws them out. Most of the names are straightforward twists on the existing heroes such as Ironed Man, the Scarlet Wench, the Visionary, Wondrous Man, the Wisp and Buckeye, but calling Quasar's parody "Motorola" is a joke that doesn't work well without background knowledge. ("Quasar" is a brand of electronics originally from Motorola, but the name doesn't seem to have been used outside the US and Motorola sold the brand 15 years before this issue was published.)

This is mainly a strip full of gags but it also does something very surprising. There's a mystery villain who overstays their time in the One-Hour Lurking Zone and their identity is revealed. And, as we'll see later on, it's the identity of the mysterious stranger, published (according to Mike's Amazing World of Comics) three weeks before both regular comics that revealed it went on sale. It has to be said that the stranger's identity hasn't been too well disguised, but it's astonishing that a parody comic could do this even with the crossover's core writer at the helm. Maybe the schedule or the shipping got mixed up (a problem that has hit a lot of Avengers based crossovers over the years) or maybe the identity was considered so obvious as to not try to disguise it any further.

This issue also contains three other parody tales with an especial emphasis on some of the most popular characters and themes in comics at the time, and not just at Marvel. "Origin of the Pulverizer" takes a twist on the origin of the Punisher (starting with a scene in a park when a gang boss kicks a boy's dog into orbit) and throws in several elements from other series and characters, particularly Batman. But the moment that really made me sit up in surprise is the scene where the man who will become the Pulverizer sits contemplating how to instil terror into criminals only to be hit by a brick through the window which results in inspiration for his visual identity. I wonder if Doug Rice and Hilary Barta were aware of Lew Stringer's wonderful Brickman, which did the exact same joke over a decade earlier. In reverse, Stringer recalls that he was certainly aware of this:

Ha! Yes, I remember seeing this at the time, 11 years after I first did the gag. He drew it better than me, but I still think it's funnier if it smashes through the window. (Who'd throw a brick through an open window?)

— Lew Stringer (@lewstringer) November 9, 2017

"Sore wants a Haircut!" sees the character go to the barber's only to find it specialises in a particular style seen across multiple Marvel characters. "Adventure into Boredom! Fear!" sees a confrontation between the Man-Thang and the Swamp-Thang about their origin and the style of the words in their respective strips. The comic also mocks some of the adverts from bygone years, whether for Marvel merchandise or for toy weapons or dubious archaeological finds. There's even a back-page parody of the "build up your muscles to deal with bullies on the beach" adverts that throws in a parody of Thor for good measure.

All in all this is quite a fun little piece that playfully mocks Marvel and beyond, though at the time it would have lost marks for giving away the identity of the mysterious stranger. But beyond that it's good for what it is.

What The--?! #6 has been reprinted in:

• Avengers by John Byrne Omnibus (2016)

Excalibur 14 - Acts of Vengeance

It's surprising just how many parodies "Acts of Vengeance" generated during its run. Over the course of these reviews I'll be looking at each one of them. Curiously this one appeared even before the crossover itself began.

Excalibur #14

Writer: Chris Claremont
Penciler: Alan Davis
Inker: Paul Neary
Letterer: Agustin Mas
Colourist: Glynis Oliver
Editor: Terry Kavanagh
Chief Correspondent: Tom DeFalco

Created by Chris Claremont and Alan Davis, Excalibur combined elements from both the Uncanny X-Men and Captain Britain. Based in the United Kingdom the team had a variety of unique adventures. Excalibur is otherwise one of the few mainstream universe Marvel series from this era to have escaped from "Acts of Vengeance". Maybe this is because the crossover fell right in the middle of the "Cross-Time Caper" storyline that meant the characters simply weren't available for an event on Earth (although as we'll see, this did not prevent other series from being caught up in the storyline). Perhaps it was a sign of creator autonomy, with Claremont being largely able to keep the title away from much of the Marvel universe and particularly from a rival's storyline.

This is the third chapter in the "Cross-Time Caper" which ran and ran (and ran and ran...) over a whole year, taking the team on a tour through many alternate realities. The first chunk of the issue is taken up with the conclusion of an adventure in a world where Arthurian magic has continued to the present day and where Prince William is about to marry Katherine. (I wonder if the real Prince William ever read this issue and got a hint...)

Later the team are taken to another strange Earth with a strong dose of parody of the regular Marvel universe. All the heroes and villains are fighting each other as part of "Acts of Vengeance" and each is a distorted version of their true selves. Meggan and Nightcrawler are shown a key source of the problems - two men each trying to outdo the other to generate "the latest cataclysmic cosmic cross-continuity caper". The men are drawn as Chris Claremont and John Byrne. The issue climaxes with the arrival of Galactus and an appearance by the Impossible Man.

Read in isolation this is quite a mixed issue. Interim chapters of structured sagas from this era are often somewhat impenetrable and it's a pity a full issue wasn't given over to the second reality. It's full of jokes from the Hulk with the mind of a baby to Goliath having grown so tall he reaches the edge of the atmosphere to Rick Jones being made into the ultimate fan sidekick. The digs at "Acts of Vengeance" and Byrne are fairly subtle, perhaps reflecting the limited amount that had been revealed about the crossover at that stage, though the point that each kept trying to outdo the other has something to it with the ever-growing size of these events - "Inferno" had about forty-five separate issues, "Acts of Vengeance" close to seventy with the banner alone. And the concept of heroes fighting each other’s villains isn't really delved into, although Phoenix encountering Galactus could be said to be in the spirit of the thing. All in all, this isn't really an essential issue for the event.

Excalibur #14 has been reprinted in:

• Excalibur Classic Volume 3 - Cross-Time Caper Book 1 (2007)
• Excalibur Epic Collection: The Cross-Time Caper (2018)